MaariyaThinks

I will not shy away from giving you advice where it’s needed. However, I’m not shy to leave you, to step away when I see you influenced or influencing that which is bad. I have a tendency to invite my readers to board my train of thought by exercising a monotonous regularity every time. Start a trend and it will develop into a habit, but this time it isn’t out of habit, it’s out of despair; this time it’s a different sweat.

Uncovering a formula that incorporates a balance of perspective in a world where if you’re too pleasant it will eat you up, and if you’re frightful it will spit you out, unfolded into a tiresome adventure (or something of the sort). A means to put an end to the snags in the blueprint. To obtain a chain of solutions, the first step was to highlight the soaring indistinguishable issues that have persistently been a source of distraction for all too long.

I sought it best to put together a list of the subject areas that have been scrutinized in MaariyaThinks so far:

  • Contretemps– Judgement vs. observation
  • Marriage– History of marriage vs. the current trend
  • Ego– Body, mind, soul and religion
  • Fickle friend– Sacrifice
  • Tech addict– Technology vs. 21st Century
  • I do not have a title– Reality vs. Dreams
  • Word– Inadequacy of words?
  • Influenced– Truth
  • Forgive– Forgiveness vs. Justice
  • 01/01/2016– Desires, needs and frustrations
  • Happy Holidays– Attitude vs. change
  • Closure– Perspective vs. Will to truth
  • 14/12/2015– Happiness?
  • December– Change
  • End of 2014?– The future

I expect that you may have reached at the same destination. Regardless, I insist on drawing you a map.Real life is not one dimensional. As individuals, we find ourselves being pulled in many directions by myriad internal and external forces. In a society, the complexity increases manifold as these forces intersect in complex ways. But how do you view your position? How far do you abuse your freedom of choice?

To officially conclude MaariyaThinks; yesterday we debated about your actions, we pointed the finger at you, we thought you were wrong when we weren’t right, we forgot what was important for you and what is important for our souls; but each time God helped me through it, through the doors of religion (Islam) we found our answers.

Remember… ‘Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines!’ – Robery H. Schuller.   Like the lines on this page you can’t see, that make reading this text a lot easier.

“You can’t control how other people receive your energy. Anything you do or say gets filtered through the lens of whatever they are going through at the moment, which is not about you. Just keep doing your thing with as much integrity and love as possible.” Nanea Hoffman –

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CONTRETEMPS

The perception of a single meaning is called a conception, the perception of the relation between two is known as a judgement. The first should always be mentioned before the second because it naturally precedes it.

-It is wrong to judge without obtaining initial conception?

Perception is literally what we call time, a method where one moment is compared to another. So time comes to exist as a result of comparisons made between a number of illusions stored in the brain. Therefore time is not an absolute fact but a sort of perception. Einstein sets the mark here, his theory of General Relativity states that “time has no independent existence apart from the order of events by which we measure it”… And that’s all I have to say about that.

I previously cited Nietzsche regarding his argument on the will to truth; ‘… the question as to which perception of the world is correct is quite meaningless’. Due to the uniqueness of every ego, we individually experience the same event differently, each ego takes heed of its own will to truth consciously whilst disregarding the real way of life. You see the brain is real while the mind is not. The mind is the uncontrolled thoughts that evidently spiral into existence from the subconscious. As the brain in used as a tool to recall names, places, numbers and memories; the mind is an obstruction, an aggravation.

I want to speak of choice less awareness, by that I am referring to observation, constant observation of ones self to the state where the mind’s unconscious tendencies wake the conscious. Let’s say that observations of this sort banish attachments. Through choice less awareness we not only become detached, we refrain from labelling any passions or desires (as good or bad), we execute our habitually judgemental self and simply become a witness- standing apart.  The critic, the conscious, the opinionated arrogance to reality no longer needs our companionship. Free we shall be. Widows to our conditioned mind.

Truth is you really are what you think… The EGOistic mind can be easily distracted and engulfed by one state of being. For example, you could influence your mind to focus solely on forgiveness and justice; you do so by engaging your efforts and energy into attaining forgiveness and justice. Or you may chose to focus on your needs and desires; through which your being becomes dedicated to selfishness.

Must it be one or the other? Why can’t we each pick a state that fits in alliance to our ego – but isn’t controlled by our ego – and simply switch to another mode irrespective of time and emotion? Maybe that is what we do, we become governed by a state of our ego, a state that dictates our every action and judgement until we are compiled to switch to another.

What we acknowledge to be is comprised of the judgements made by our mind, but what is the source of our conceptions? The answer is simple, our perceptions are based on previous observations or pre-conditioned experiences or the beliefs we hold. We feel how we feel because of what we have previously experienced, we see what we chose to see, we hear what we’re used to hearing because it’s what we’ve been taught, it’s what we know… and the list goes on. Change what you see, change what you listen to, change who you spend your time with and you will see the change within you, it’s as simple as that (if you chose to).

 

 

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Marriage

“You were born together, and together you shall be forever more. You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days. Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God. But let there be spaces in your togetherness, and let the winds of the heavens dance between you” –Khahlil Gibran 

The thing is, I’m unsure on what I should focus on regarding marriage. My aim is to capture its beauty, not with a hidden agenda to persuade my readers, but a blueprint that entails the development and purpose of it- it shouldn’t take long. I’m going to say this just once though, religion is essentially a mode of actual living therefore it is the only serious way of handling reality. Marriage (wiki) is a socially recognised legal union between spouses, it establishes rights and obligations between them and their children, and between them and their in-laws, as well as society in general. For Sir Roland Wilson; ‘marriage is a contract for the purpose of legalising sexual intercourse and the procreation of children’.

The development of marriage is a matter of historical interest, originating from irregular and marital unions which ultimately gave way to elopement with consent. Bare in mind though, the transition from the sacramental indissolubility of marriage to the treatment of marriage as a civil institution is a modern idea.

Forget ancient IndiaGreece, Rome, Germany and the other countless countries that can be mentioned here that outline their institutions of buying females to serve as slaves and concubines. It wasn’t pleasant back in those days; we’ve come a long way since then thanks to the Abrahamic religions. They deserve an applause, because their scriptures introduced and preached a union between a man and women before God, giving women status, equality and security. Religion altered the notion that a woman was like an acquisition of a thing, for example in Islam dowry was introduced by Prophet Muhammed (pbuh), the system was not a new idea exclusive to Muslims, but the advantages of incorporating such a custom within marriage only reinforced good will for both participants. The more we study the system of marriage we further realise how unique of a system to happiness it evidently becomes. Forget the hurdles we may come to face, they merely provide pressure for people to grow up.

In Islam marriage is considered to be the stronghold of chastity (Quran 4:24). By way of example, you need to familiarise yourself with the following Islamic injunction which states, ‘children should be married off as soon as they attain puberty’. However, the mad race for making money and obtaining a degree has relegated this injunction to the background, to the extent where to fulfil sexual desires unlawful means are perforce replacing lawful means. It’s fair to argue and practice your stance on the suitable age for marriage, we’re educated abundantly to decide for ourselves when the time is right for us to do so. What’s the problem? It’s clear as crystal, you simply cannot cool down sexual desires with B.As, M.As, PhDs or with any amount of money. The burden of unlawful acts lies both on the defaulters and the parents, for the parent is responsible for the marriage of their offspring.

Look at it this way; man and woman indulge in sexual lust without marriage, but this kind of love is not real love, but a liaison for sexual satisfaction which is designated as love. When the satisfaction has been obtained or conversely when the bid to obtain satisfaction fails, the liaison is broken. There is neither love nor affection. Both are consigned to limbo. The marriage-bond on the other hand is not transitory, its offer and acceptance are exchanged and the compact scaled for life-long partnership. You see marriage does not simply satisfy physical desires, it elevates the position of the man-he becomes head of a household- and the woman- she becomes the mistress of a home. 

I’m sure we are all aware of the common debates that effortless arise when it comes to the topic of marriage, and Muslims are no exception. Today’s society may find this talk distasteful, because they think ‘settling down’ marks the end of a fun life, they rather go on endless dates with their boyfriends/girlfriends, move in together and even start a family because they say that there isn’t enough money in the bank . How could that possibly be better than what marriage offers?  

They tell you not to get attached, they say now it’s the right time.They both forget that their ‘attachment only reduces marriage to a quest for safety, security, and compensation for childhood disappointments’ (Weintraub:2012)

After all it is an ancient axiom that “truth is bitter”, Gibran can explain the bitterness; ‘your reason and your passion are the rudder and the sails of your seafaring soul. If either your sails or your rudder be broken, you can but toss and drift, or else be held at a standstill in mid-seas. For reason, ruling alone, is a force confining; and passion, unattended, is a flame that burns to its own destruction’.  

“Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts” -Khahlil Gibran

Gibran (1923) The Prophet 

Muhammed-Ullah (2000) Woman in Islamic Sharia

Weintraub (2012) Psychology Today

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EGO

It’s just the tip of the iceberg.

Western thought idealizes the ego as the thinking, feeling and acting subject that is conscious of itself, it’s responsible for reality testing and provides a sense of personal identity. All that said, let this western definition melt in the ocean. I want to lift the curtain, let me explain the true significance of the term ego. Bring it on the stage.

The real metaphysical definition of Ego that is of concern here is the I in ego. As in the ego man, who by reason of his divinity makes and remakes as he wills. In this lie his greatest strength and his greatest weakness.

Maariya thinks similar to Muhammad Allama Iqbal (1877/1938). 

Part 1- Ego reveals itself as part of our mental states. For example, the mental state can not exist in isolation, and so mental states intertwine with one another and that is what we call the mind. Mental unity is absolutely unique of course, it does not concern itself with material, distance, time, conscious or the unconsciousness (previously mentioned in regard to I do not have a title‘ and 01/01/2016‘). 

To sum up; ego is not space-bound as the body is space-bound, mental and physical events are both in time, however the ego takes no notice of this.

-So would it be fair to suggest that true time duration belongs to the ego alone?

Part 2–  A second characteristic of the ego has to be its essential privacy which reveals the uniqueness of every ego. So my desire for something is my own, its satisfaction means private enjoyment. My satisfactions are my own and they are unique. They’re an anomaly to society, and that bothers me.

In short; pleasures, pains and desires form a part of the private ego alone. Thus your ‘recognition’ of places/people refers itself to your past experience- not the past experience of another ego. This unique interrelation of our mental state which we express by ‘I’ opens the door to the problem of psychology…

-What is the nature of ‘I’?

According to the beloved Nietzsche, man has become the kind of being that negotiates its environment by asking questions about it- in terms of knowledge and truth. BUT this ego is called upon to live in a complex environment and cannot maintain a system which delivers assurance to the behavior of things around it. This environment is a system and not a friend of the nature of Reality. So the ego understands and masters its environment through which it amplifies its freedom.

-So how does man guide and direct his ego with regard to his freedom?

I guess how we put this ego to use is what makes every single one of us unique. I guess it’s how we are taught to use our free will. I suppose each and every experience is nothing but our reaction to it. I suppose I should refer back to the set teachings I was taught to marry and that will be the key to my success.

So if we are saying that the ego directs us to make distinctions so then what gives importance to our personal opinions then what guides the ego? The ego of itself is possessed of nothing. It is a mere ignorant child of innocence floating in the Mind of Being, but through the door of its consciousness must pass all the treasures of God.

Yet we know that the only thing which distinguishes the people is righteousness:

“And We did certainly give Moses the Torah and followed up after him with messengers. And We gave Jesus, the son of Mary, clear proofs and supported him with the Pure Spirit. But is it [not] that every time a messenger came to you, [O Children of Israel], with what your souls did not desire, you were arrogant? And a party [of messengers] you denied and another party you killed.” -Holy Quran 2:87

It’s not how we deal with our life, it’s how we shape our mind in regard to the family we are born into. What we become from then on is a mind dedicated to the  will to truth, will to knowledge, will to power, will to love, will to happiness, a will to complete satisfaction.

Ask me what the problem is.

This will was never meant for us, it was something given to us in order to test us. Why else do you think we weren’t born equals but are taught that we are. Beings with their egos are the most powerful of life- second best to aliens if you bring them into the picture of course. 

You know what makes it all so beautiful… The Qur’an and The Hadith. Stories that entail seamless words of wisdom. Learn from them and you will ease your mind, take only the best from your conscious and tie it into your unconscious.

BUT I mustn’t be oblivious to balance, priority, right, wrong, truth and everything else Islam can describe and explain better than my thinking. 
So selfless I shall be, balance will coincide with my priorities which will reflect Islamic principles and from then on right will be on the right and wrong will dry out into ashes on the left. 
 
 

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Fickle Friend

Have you ever wondered why you’ve stopped doing that certain thing you’ve always done as far back as you can remember? Let me give an example; you ritually watch television every evening before you go to bed, suddenly for no apparent reason in this current climate and the seasons that follow you religiously obliterate your evening television exercise. Have you ever questioned if -for the sake of the aforementioned example-this change or perhaps this permanent exchange has in one form or another benefited you or influenced the total negative? The devil’s in the detail, pay heed and let’s dig.

What are your priorities? What do you sacrifice? What motivates the reasoning behind your choices ? What of the sacrifices you make when you comprise for the sake of priority and loyalty? Do these sacrifices actually suffice as sacrifices? As far as dictionary.com is concerned there is no real guideline as to what must come first in order of preference, it’s all down to you. Sophrosyne; why cut out when we can simply cut down?

Sacrifice: the surrender or destruction of something prized or desirable for the sake of something considered as having a higher or more pressing claim. 

A quick get away may not be the answer to your prayers, but it most certainly will help. We’ve all been acquainted with that uninvited consciousness, the one where it all goes amiss at the same one time. You unknowingly yearn for guidance, AKA a change of perspective during such a peculiar period, yet your subconscious argues otherwise… ignore it.

Help doesn’t follow you, so ask for it, neither does it come in the form of customer service. Think of it as a challenge, a deadline, a meeting, a presentation, its all make or break no matter what the matter is. The solution of the problem is the problem. Take the positive from every experience, assess the present and focus on the future. A problem will only distract you as much as you let it, the evidence is all in your head, take a look.

“You either get bitter or you get better. It’s that simple. You either take what has been dealt to you and allow it to make you a better person, or you allow it to tear you down. The choice does not belong to fate, it belongs to you.” ~ Josh Ship

Find people who relate to your perspective in life, or stick with people with an opposite outlook and you will find your eventual demise, the proof’s in their fragrance. But there are always two sides to a story, instant dismissal of someone that doesn’t match your train of thought is not the point, exchanging good with them may open doors.  You may not be able to change ones perspective as their experience of life will inevitably differ from yours, you need to adjust to it in order to gain a friendship, an understanding, a relationship, the adjusting is what I like to call sacrifice. I pray the person is worthy of your sacrifice because it isn’t easy to gamble that sort of loyalty for the sake of another, be advised it demands acknowledging.  Experience isn’t to blame, nor is my perspective, neither is yours, it’s just the will that may be absent in your/their actions. Trust and loyalty, keep it safe, keep it hidden, use it, give it and take it.

I never really understood the meaning behind ‘what are friends for‘; a remark my close friends have said to me over the years. I am proud to share that I have mastered the reasoning behind this statement. From today onwards I will say it to you. Don’t feel bad if people remember you only when they need you, feel privileged that you are a candle that comes to their mind when there is darkness.

Be careful of your words, they may not carry as much weight as your actions, but they carry your image when you’re not here. Be wise in your decisions, look to yourself for optimism. Remember “Every positive value has its price in negative terms… the genius of Einstein leads to Hiroshima.” ― Pablo Picasso

 

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Tech addict

I need to get something of my mind, and it’s not you.

What defines abuse? What’s to say I’m using my phone too much, who can categorize and limit my use on the internet? When is it too much time wasted? Shelve your daily struggles for the nonce and turn your attention to technology.

A room full of people, and they’re all staring into the black mirror. It parades all but their beauty, it disturbs the peace in the room, it insists we neglect what’s before us. What ever happened to living in the present. Stop planning the future and barricade the past.

Technology was to be a beautiful invention, now I despise its existence. Don’t text her when I’m sat next to you, she’s not here. I am. What ever happened to conversing? Technology happened. The TV doesn’t bother me, you can enjoy being fat and lazy.

“Life is like a prism. What you see depends on how you turn the glass.”                       Jonathan Kellerman

The drug of tech has us hooked, surely side-effects must prevail. Meet Charlie Brooker; ‘We routinely do things that just five years ago would scarcely have made sense to us. We tweet along to reality shows; we share videos of strangers dropping cats in bins; we dance in front of Xboxes that can see us, and judge us, and find us sorely lacking. It’s hard to think of a single human function that technology hasn’t somehow altered, apart perhaps from burping.’

Do we enjoy switching from one black screen to another? I know I don’t. I read somewhere that many predicted the invention of the television would go unnoticed because people would not have the time to sit and watch it.

Technology is all very well when it’s used for the right reasons; just limit, watch, question and contemplate your use of it.

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I do not have a title

  • What constitutes real?

Is real what passes through your eyes? as far as we know, eyes do not process information, rather they gather occasions or situations. 

It is the brain that transfers these images and allocates them to happiness, love and laughter. So then it seems what we see is not real, rather it is what we process and what the brain decides, that is real.

Well, if you ask me; it’s all an illusion, it’s all fake, it’s all about fake it till you make it. You know how the ‘world’ works nowadays. It’s an idea that they’ve made us buy into. An idea so contentious it makes me teary eyed. A scheme which wasn’t designed to bring us a better life but a perception of how one should live, sought by those wise men who never lived. This mundane, materialistic, ignorant, selfish concept of a Hollywood/Bollywood lifestyle we yearn to aspire to because for some odd reason it defines success!

Maybe emotions have a part to play after all, they mark the difference between a virtual reality that latches onto hearts and one which solely catches eyes. I remorse all the emotions I fail to experience partly due to the veil put before my eyes. Just because it prevails doesn’t mean it can’t be removed.

  • So where do dreams come from?

Are desires born in my head or heart? Do my eyes dictate what is real? does my brain transport me through my life? Or is it the heart, does the heart see, does it feel? Does it show me what i really want to see?

What of dreams? Dreams we have while we sleep, or dreams we yearn to live? They say ‘make your dreams come true’, ‘work hard today and live the rest of your life as a champion’, ‘work hard in silence let success be your noise’. Then they preach these motivating one-liners on networking sites using large bold fonts because they want to drive you to a better life, a life you’ve only read about and seen on the TV. However,they know their audience is weak, words can only be stretched as far as their meaning. So they combine pictures with these quotes, pictures of the perfect beach body, a man driving the latest car, a prestige mansion, skyscrapers, the Burj Khalifa and so on.

They insist your desires become like theirs, they make you feel as you deserve a lavish lifestyle and so you define your success according to that picture, to that quote preached by that celebrity that you later learnt committed suicide.

Im merely expressing an opinion, an opinion that wasn’t designed to conflict with your dreams, but an opinion which insists you to take a skeptic approach.

What’s influencing your dreams? Who’s reality are you living?

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